I recently attended a Somatic Workshop at my local bookstore / third space, and wanted to pass along some of the wisdom I learned! Vanessa Verlee, author of Tricks for a Less Nervous System, guided us through somatic exercises that can help ground us in anxious moments. Here are some quick ones you can try:

1. Balancing breath: Close your right nostril slowly inhaling through your left, then close your left nostril, exhaling slowly through your right.

   1. Inhaling through your left is said to be cooling and calming, while the right is energizing and activating.

2. 5-4-3-2-1: Name aloud five things you can see, four things you can feel, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one thing you can taste.

   1. This helps shift your nervous system from fight or flight into a more regulated, present state.

3. Humming: Hum a song or simple tone— the vibration from humming stimulates the vagus nerve also activating a restful state.

While these may seem like small or overly simple ways to combat anxiety, they really do teach our bodies to not be in survival mode anticipating a threat. Plus, they’re easy to do and can be done wherever! I’d love to hear if anyone else has other tips that help you :)

— Annie

If you’re new, check out our intro to Steady Sunday here!

💻 This Week’s Meetings

You can always find our full monthly meeting calendar here!

Tuesday, 4/21 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

Thursday, 4/23 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

Sunday, 4/26 — 10-11 a.m. PT / 1-2 p.m. ET

Zoom meeting links are sent in our Discord chat:

Join the Discord

✨ Meeting Notes

• This week, we talked about how when you’re quitting a substance (or any vice), it’s important to set barriers in place to make it harder to fall back into old habits. Instead of relying on willpower alone, you can try to limit temptations (as much as they’re in your control or influence) and use your support system to hold yourself accountable. Here are some ways you can do that using alcohol as an example:

  • Tell a trusted person you’re not drinking and why this decision matters to you. Having an accountability buddy will help you feel more supported when you’re faced with temptations.

  • Make access to alcohol less convenient. If possible, keep alcohol out of your home and try to avoid frequenting places where drinking is the main activity (bars, breweries, etc.), especially in early sobriety. The environments you’re in and people you’re around play a big part in this.

  • Plan things to look forward to for when you’d usually be drinking. For example, if you usually go out to drink on Friday nights, replace that routine with something else like a fun movie night with friends.

    • One member shared they like to schedule early morning yoga classes so they’ll be less inclined to drink the night before. Such a great idea! :)

✍️ Journal Prompt

What’s an intention you have for this week and how can you hold yourself accountable to follow through on your intention?

Always cheering you on,

-Steph & Annie

P.S. Have ideas for anything you’d like to see in this newsletter? Comment on this post or reply to this email!

I don’t have too much to share today, so thought I’d share my intentions for the week and be on my merry way :)

1. No scrolling after work! I always feel blah when I spend the evening scrolling, but I’m realizing the times I’ve tried to cut back haven’t really worked because I didn’t replace it with anything (similar to when we remove alcohol). So this week, I want to actually swap it out for something that takes my focus away from my phone, i.e. building my pinboard!! I picked up a big foam board from Home Depot, some fabric, and a staple gun, and I’m going to turn it into something like this:

   

2. Expect the unexpected. The past few weeks at work have reminded me how fast things can change and how little I can actually predict! Instead of letting that stress me out, I want to lean into it and trust that things will work out the way they’re supposed to.

3. Journal before bed at least twice this week (keeping it realistic). I find it sooo helpful to brain dump at the end of the day.

I hope you take a moment to reflect on your intentions for this week!

— Steph

If you’re new, check out our intro to Steady Sunday here!

💻 This Week’s Meetings

You can always find our full monthly meeting calendar here!

Tuesday, 3/31 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

Thursday, 4/2 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

Sunday, 4/5 — 10-11 a.m. PT / 1-2 p.m. ET

Zoom meeting links are sent in our Discord chat:

Join the Discord

✨ Meeting Notes

• This week, someone shared that one of the deeper lessons sobriety has taught them is to let go of black-and-white thinking. If you’re used to this mindset, it can show up in every area of your life: how you see yourself, how you handle relationships, and the choices you make. When everything gets reduced to extremes—like your relationship being either good or bad, or you being either a good person or a bad person—it can feel very limiting. Very few things in life are purely one way or the other—there is almost always some nuance. Learning to sit in that in-between space, rather than labeling everything as a total win or a complete failure, can be incredibly freeing.

• There might be days in sobriety where you’re white-knuckling it and the urge to drink feels intense. On those days, it can help to ground yourself in the bigger picture. Change doesn’t happen overnight, and when progress feels slow, it’s easy to lose sight of what you’re gaining. Reminding yourself of what you’re choosing and what you’re leaving behind can help bring that clarity and perspective you need. Consider the following examples of what you might gain or lose in sobriety versus active substance abuse:

Gained in sobriety:

• Respect & trust (with yourself + the people in your life)

• Peace and mental clarity

• Freedom and stability

• Being proud of yourself

Challenges in sobriety:

• Discomfort and unfamiliar feelings

• Grieving old habits or identity

• Adjusting to new routines and coping tools

Gained in active substance use:

• Temporary relief or escape from pain or discomfort

• Familiar coping skills

Lost in active substance use:

• Self-esteem and emotional stability

• Healthy relationships

• Physical and mental well-being

• Long-term “peace” for short-term relief

📎 Resource of the Week

This week, Nadia shared this amazing piece about how screen time affects our nervous systems, and practical tips to break the cycle! Highly recommend giving it a read.

feeling good with emilina

Ask Emilina #2: Breaking a Social Media Addiction

Hi friends…

Read more

2 months ago · 19 likes · 1 comment · Emilina Lomas, MSc, R.Nutr.

✍️ Journal Prompt

Before ever engaging with the idea of sobriety, what would you tell yourself were the good parts about drinking or using other substances? How do you see it now if you have a new perspective?

Always cheering you on,

-Steph & Annie

P.S. Have ideas for anything you’d like to see in this newsletter? Comment on this post or reply to this email!

I’m proud to share that I celebrated 6 years of recovery last week. I’ve mentioned this before, but I’ve now been in recovery longer than I ever drank, which is still SO strange to wrap my head around.

I’ll admit, this year’s milestone felt a bit quieter than the rest. Maybe that’s just what happens the further along you get, but I know I never want to stop celebrating it, even if the celebration looks or feels different.

The biggest difference between me six years ago and me today is that I'm proud of who I am — and dare I say, I actually like myself. For a long time I couldn't say that and mean it (the consistent cycle of shame and self-sabotage made sure of that).

I love the way my sober self moves through the world. I love the way I treat people. I love that I'm a good friend, sister, and partner. I love that my friends feel safe with me and trust me. And I love that Grady and I’s Saturday morning coffee walks get me just as excited as getting ready for a night out used to.

If you’re somewhere in your recovery where the future feels dark (and maybe you don’t like yourself very much), I promise it gets better. And until then, Steady Sunday is here for you to lean on <3

Thank you all for being such an important part of my journey xx

— Steph

If you’re new, check out our intro to Steady Sunday here!

💻 This Week’s Meetings

You can always find our full monthly meeting calendar here!

Tuesday, 3/24 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

Thursday, 3/26 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

Sunday, 3/29 — 10-11 a.m. PT / 1-2 p.m. ET

Zoom meeting links are sent in our Discord chat:

Join the Discord

✨ Meeting Notes

• Something that came up in our meetings this week, and feels true for so many of us, is the feeling of being “behind” when we compare ourselves to our peers. Especially in our 20s/30s, it can feel overwhelming to watch people around us get engaged, get promoted at work, buy a home, go on exciting trips, or hit other milestones that our society praises. So many of us see these things and feel like we’re doing something wrong or we’re not where we “should” be. Here are a few reminders we chatted through in case this comes up for you too:

  • Life is not a race and nobody is keeping score!! You don’t need to check off boxes on a timeline that doesn’t actually exist. You are where you’re meant to be.

  • Someone else having something you want for yourself doesn’t take anything away from you or mean you won’t have it too.

  • No one’s life is perfect, even if it looks that way from the outside. And social media especially is a highlight reel that can make us forget that all of us have struggles.

  • There will always be something that feels “missing” if you’re looking for it. Instead, try to think about how far you’ve come and give yourself credit for your own growth. You deserve to give yourself that grace and acknowledgement!!

🏆 Win of the Week

G.S. hit 3 weeks!

✍️ Journal Prompt

When was the last time you said “that’s okay” to something that didn’t actually feel okay? Was it to prioritize someone else’s comfort, avoid conflict, or something else? What might it look like to honor your needs and boundaries next time? ❤️

Always cheering you on,

-Steph & Annie

P.S. Have ideas for anything you’d like to see in this newsletter? Comment on this post or reply to this email!

Last week was the definition of a whirlwind! I ran De Soi’s booth at Expo West (aka the “Super Bowl” of trade shows for snack and beverage brands). It was intense and exhausting, but I’m so proud of how it all came together. One of the coolest parts was how many people I got to chat with at our booth who were sober, sober-curious, or looking to cut back on their drinking. Those convos were definitely the highlight amidst the chaos of the week!

That’s all from me from me for now. Hope everyone has a great week :)

— Steph

If you’re new, check out our intro to Steady Sunday here!

💻 This Week’s Meetings

You can always find our full monthly meeting calendar here!

Tuesday, 3/10 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

Thursday, 3/12 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

Sunday, 3/15 — 10-11 a.m. PT / 1-2 p.m. ET

Zoom meeting links are sent in our Discord chat:

Join the Discord

✨ Meeting Notes

• This week, we talked about how challenging it can be to maintain sobriety beyond the big, obvious moments. A few members shared that while they were able to stay sober for a specific event, milestone, or reason, once that “big” thing passed, it felt like there was no longer a finish line to work towards. The ordinary, uneventful days that follow can somehow feel more difficult. But sobriety isn’t just for the exciting, high-stakes situations. It’s built in the quiet, mundane moments too. It teaches us to lean on consistency rather than fleeting bursts of motivation. Consistency in those quiet moments is what transforms sobriety from a goal into a lifestyle.

• Similarly, sobriety teaches us to break the habit of chasing instant gratification. Just as it exists in both the eventful and the ordinary days, true recovery asks us to stop seeking a quick fix or temporary escape. Instead, it invites us into slower, deeper work: unlearning old behaviors, sitting with discomfort, and learning what actually serves us long term. That process can feel unglamorous or even uncertain at times, but the rewards are lasting. Stronger relationships, genuine self-esteem, peace of mind, and a life built on integrity are far more fulfilling than any fleeting buzz ever was.

• Many of us can relate to how quickly something simple starts to carry a lot of pressure. We want the experience, trip, or night out to be great, meaningful, memorable, relaxing, or all of the above. But when expectations turn into pressure (“this has to be perfect, this has to recharge me, this has to matter”), we can slip out of the present moment and into a “performance of enjoyment”. The more we chase the feelings we think we should be having, the easier it is to miss the experience itself. Sometimes the best thing we can do is take the pressure off. When we stop needing something to feel amazing, we can accept it for what it is (which can let us actually enjoy it more!)

🏆 Win of the Week

N.H. reached 2 months sober!

B.J. quit vaping!

✍️ Journal Prompt

When do you feel most like yourself?

Is it when you’re striving to be the best version of yourself, or when you’re operating from a version you’re not proud of?

If it’s the latter, why do you think that is? What might change if you began to see your best self not as an exception, but as the truest version of who you are, the one most aligned with your values?

Always cheering you on,

-Steph & Annie

P.S. Have ideas for anything you’d like to see in this newsletter? Comment on this post or reply to this email!

I was in Miami last weekend for the South Beach Food & Wine Festival where my company (De Soi) was sampling. Let me tell you, I did not expect to spend as much time in and around wine/booze culture as I do working for a non-alcoholic cocktail brand.

There are moments when my lack of knowledge about the wine and spirits world makes me feel a little behind at work. I stopped drinking before I ever really got into wine or cocktails, so it can feel like I skipped a chapter that everyone else has read. At work, we’re constantly talking about cocktails, flavor profiles, and the occasions we’re designing drinks for and I never really have anything to add to the conversation. I’m not sure where I’m going with this, but it’s been on my mind lately! I also know this feeling isn’t unique to me (looking at you sober bartenders/servers).

All in all, I’m really proud of myself. The festival was three full days surrounded by booths pouring free alcohol, and I still walked away feeling grounded and accomplished! And that’s thanks to the solid foundation I’ve built over the last 6 years with the help of you all <3

— Steph

If you’re new, check out our intro to Steady Sunday here!

💻 This Week’s Meetings

You can always find our full monthly meeting calendar here!

Tuesday, 3/3 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

Thursday, 3/5 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

Sunday, 3/8 — 10-11 a.m. PT / 1-2 p.m. ET

Zoom meeting links are sent in our Discord chat:

Join the Discord

✨ Meeting Notes

• Sometimes maturing means realizing that you can’t fix a loved one’s problems, no matter how much you care. You don’t have to put all that pressure on yourself to have the “perfect” advice. Most of the time, people just want someone to sit with them and really listen. You don’t have to solve anything - just being there and showing that you care is enough.

  • It’s okay to realize that your role in someone’s life isn’t to be their support system. Sometimes you’re too close, or the relationship just doesn’t work that way, and that’s perfectly okay!

• Many of us on our sober journeys have experienced people projecting their own drinking discomfort onto us. Sometimes it shows up as “jokes”, subtle comments, pressure, or assumptions about what our boundaries are. It can feel like we’re being judged, excluded, or made into “the buzzkill”. If someone seems uncomfortable around your sobriety or keeps framing it as a negative, remember that this likely has everything to do with them and not you. You get to decide what your sober social life looks like. You get to set your boundaries. And you don’t have to shrink, explain, or compromise your growth to make someone else feel more comfortable.

• This week, we talked about the importance of having an accountability buddy, whether it’s for your sobriety or something else you’re working toward. When you share a commitment with someone you trust and explain why it matters to you, you’re much more likely to follow through. The next time you need some extra support, whether that’s attending an event where you might feel tempted to drink, having a difficult but necessary conversation, or making some other positive change in your life, consider asking someone to be your accountability buddy! Having somebody in your corner who encourages you and is there to support you can make all the difference. You can always reach out in the Discord chat too :) As we often say, “Healing cannot happen in isolation”!

🏆 Win of the Week

Z.S. got into GRAD SCHOOL!

L.S. is 5 days sober!

J is 3 days sober!

SO PROUD OF YOU ALL!!!

✍️ Journal Prompt

Reflect on a time when you may’ve felt pressure to placate someone else’s discomfort with your sobriety.

Did you downplay your boundaries, laugh something off that bothered you, or stay quiet to keep the peace? How did that feel afterward?

Now imagine what it looks like to stand firmly in your sobriety and advocate for yourself. How do you deserve to be treated, and what would honoring that actually look like? ❤️

Always cheering you on,

-Steph & Annie

P.S. Have ideas for anything you’d like to see in this newsletter? Comment on this post or reply to this email!

The last few Sunday meetings have really been filling my cup. I sooo appreciate you all for consistently showing up for yourselves and for each other.

I’ll keep this brief, but I wanted to share one quote that brought me comfort in today’s meeting:

“There are so many people you haven’t met and so many experiences you haven’t had yet.”

Aka - your world isn’t limited to who or what is in it right now. If you’ve been feeling lonely, left out, or like your circle feels small, this isn’t the end of your story. You could meet your future best friend/partner/mentor tomorrow and not even know it yet!

(Thanks for that reminder, Z!!)

— Steph

If you’re new, check out our intro to Steady Sunday here!

💻 This Week’s Meetings

You can always find our full monthly meeting calendar here!

Tuesday, 2/17 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

Thursday, 2/19 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

Sunday, 2/22 — 10-11 a.m. PT / 1-2 p.m. ET

Zoom meeting links are sent in our Discord chat:

Join the Discord

✨ Meeting Notes

• It takes time for people to see a new version of you. When you first stop drinking—or if you’ve had a few starts and stops and feel like people are thinking, “Here we go again”—it’s normal to want the people in your life to notice the change right away. But recognition and rebuilding trust don’t happen overnight. Only you know how much work you’re putting in behind the scenes. You’re the one making the hard choices every day, even when it feels like no one is noticing. Try not to rush the process or look for instant validation. Just keep showing up. Steady actions rebuild trust in a way words can’t <3

• As incredible as sobriety is, let’s be real: it’s no cake walk. Choosing not to drink in a world that revolves around alcohol can feel isolating and exhausting. It’s also valid to grieve something that once brought you (temporary) relief and played such a big role in your life. Socializing sober is hard. Navigating change sober is hard. Even being alone with the constant option to drink and repeatedly choosing not to is HARD. If this comes up for you, let yourself feel it. Just try not to stay stuck there. Come back to the moments you feel grateful for your sobriety and remember how much more it adds to your life than it ever takes away. Perspective is everything. ❤️

• This week, we reflected on this question:“What advice do you give out but don’t follow yourself?” Maybe you tell friends to give themselves grace when they make a mistake, or that they’re allowed to rest when they’re running on empty, or that they deserve to advocate for themselves when they’re being treated poorly. It’s often so much easier to have compassion for the people we love than it is to extend that same kindness inward. But what would happen if we treated ourselves with the same patience, empathy, and encouragement we give to others?

🏆 Win of the Week

A.P. is one whole month sober!!

Z is 3 weeks sober!!

Congrats! 💕

📎 Resource of the Week

Always cheering you on,

-Steph & Annie

P.S. Have ideas for anything you’d like to see in this newsletter? Comment on this post or reply to this email!

Happy Super Bowl Sunday to all who celebrate, and here’s to those of us braving the day sober! (If you don’t live in the U.S., just picture New Year’s or St. Patrick’s Day–level drinking, add sports with a heavy emphasis on beer— That’s what today is.) While days like this can remind many of us how grateful we are to not be drinking, it can still be hard to feel like the odd one out. If this comes up for you, remember that you’re not missing out by staying sober, you’re actually choosing something better for yourself. You’re also totally allowed to leave or opt out entirely of the festivities. Your peace and healing come FIRST!! The Discord chat is always open if you need to vent, get some quick support, or just be reminded that you’re not alone.

Have fun, be safe, and go Seahawks! (JK I know nothing about actual football, but I hope both teams have fun <3) Now on with the newsletter!

— Annie

If you’re new, check out our intro to Steady Sunday here!

💻 This Week’s Meetings

You can always find our full monthly meeting calendar here!

Sunday, 2/8 — 10-11 a.m. PT / 1-2 p.m. ET

Tuesday, 2/10 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

Thursday, 2/12 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

Sunday, 2/15 — 10-11 a.m. PT / 1-2 p.m. ET

Zoom meeting links are sent in our Discord chat:

Join the Discord

✨ Meeting Notes

• Recently, we reflected on an important question: Do you really want to drink “normally,” or do you want to drink on your own terms, without any consequences? Many of us tell ourselves we wish we could moderate, but if we’re honest, moderation was never realistic for us or what we even actually wanted. When we accept that our lives are better with alcohol completely off the table as an option, we can finally find true freedom. As the saying goes, “One is too many and a thousand is never enough”.

• This week, we talked about how addictive our phones can feel and the shame that often follows when we find ourselves reaching for them out of habit, boredom, or as a form of escape. The more we shared, the clearer it became just how common this is, and that we’re not alone in it. Here are a few tips we discussed to combat this:

  • If you’re going to be on your phone, try to be intentional about the content you’re consuming. You’re allowed to unfollow accounts that leave you feeling insecure, drained, or overly negative. While you can’t fully control your feed, you can curate it to include more uplifting, inspiring, fun, or educational content.

  • Be mindful of when and why you’re using your phone, rather than reaching for it automatically. Pause and ask yourself what you’re looking for in that moment, and give yourself permission to take breaks. One member shared that setting a timer has helped limit how much doomscrolling happens.

  • Lean into hobbies that don’t involve screens, like reading, crafting, cooking, or spending time outside. It can feel incredibly grounding and refreshing to unplug, even for a little while.

  • Lastly, don’t beat yourself up if you’re struggling with this. We live in a technology obsessed world and it’s human to get caught up in it. Try to come from a place of wanting better for yourself, not shaming yourself for where you’re at. 💛

• Navigating changing friendship dynamics in sobriety can be so tough. It’s normal to feel left out or disconnected from friends. If you’ve always been the “fun party friend”, giving up drinking can feel like you’re losing a part of your identity and even the friendships that were built around that version of you. Please trust that it won’t feel this way forever. With time, your friendships will start to feel natural again and/or you’ll make new friends that actually fit this new stage of your life! You might not be the person people call for a crazy night out anymore (or maybe you still will be!), but you may find yourself becoming the friend they call when they need a listening ear or a wholesome weekend.

• This week we talked about the question: what’s actually healthier —having a fight, or not talking about something at all? Often, being the “peacekeeper” gets a bad rap, and it can feel like you’re supposed to have hard conversations all the time instead of letting things slide. But there’s nothing wrong with needing a non-conflict weekend. Not every moment is the right space for a hard conversation, and sometimes choosing when to talk is just as healthy as choosing to talk.

🏆 Win of the Week

• L.M. is 1 week sober!!!!

✍️ Journal Prompt

Reflect on a time when your growth or healing also came with a sense of loss. What did you have to let go of, and how did that feel? How did this loss make space for who you are becoming?

Always cheering you on,

-Steph & Annie

P.S. Have ideas for anything you’d like to see in this newsletter? Comment on this post or reply to this email!

• Happiness isn’t a constant state or a simple choice — it’s shaped by many things, including brain chemistry, hormones, mental health, and our relationships with others.

• It’s not realistic to feel “happy” all the time. Our emotions go through seasons, just like nature.

• Being hyper-focused on our individual happiness can actually pull us further away from it. Humans are relational by nature, and helping others, turning outward, and leaning on community often brings us the deepest sense of fulfillment.

• Substances can create artificial “extreme” versions of happiness and excitement, and when we chase those highs while sober, it’s no wonder we end up feeling low afterward. They’re not realistic to begin with!

• Sometimes feeling our best or “happiest” is not about chasing excitement or fun, but contentment, neutrality, and a state of steadiness.

• Putting pressure on ourselves to feel happy during situations/events that we think should make us happy doesn’t help.

— Steph

P.S. HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANNIE!!

If you’re new, check out our intro to Steady Sunday here.

💻 This Week’s Meetings

Sunday, 2/1 — 10-11 a.m. PT / 1-2 p.m. ET

Tuesday, 2/3 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

Thursday, 2/5 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

Zoom meeting links are sent in our Discord chat:

Join the Discord

✨ Meeting Notes

• As Dry January comes to a close, it’s natural for mixed feelings to come up, especially for those of us on long term sober journeys. On one hand, it can feel encouraging to see so many people experiment with a sober lifestyle and have fun with it. At the same time, it can highlight the difference between those who can (seemingly) easily step in and out of drinking versus those of us that need to be sober and don’t necessarily have a “normal” relationship with alcohol. If you notice feelings of resentment or jealousy toward people who are able to “take it or leave it,” know that you’re not alone and your feelings are completely valid. Trust the path that you’re on is right for YOU, you are never alone, and remember all the goodness that sobriety brings. ❤️

• Chrissy Teigen recently shared a powerful reflection on Instagram about her sobriety and evolving relationship with alcohol, and it’s a story many of us may relate to. She speaks to the kind of drinking you can often “get away with” by keeping up appearances and functioning on the surface. She also opens up about breaking her sobriety after a year and why she’s choosing sobriety again. Stories like this remind us that substance misuse doesn’t look one specific way, and you don’t need a dramatic rock bottom to decide you want better for yourself. Read about Chrissy Tiegen’s sobriety journey here!

🏆 Win of the Week

• Here’s to everyone who participated in Dry January in whatever way you could! You should be proud of yourself for showing up and making the effort. Hold onto what you learned along the way. There’s so much good ahead. 💛

✍️ Journal Prompt

When was the last time leaning on someone else or supporting someone else brought you a sense of calm, joy, or contentment? How might you invite more of that into your life?

Always cheering you on,

-Steph & Annie

P.S. Have ideas for anything you’d like to see in this newsletter? Comment on this post or reply to this email!

Here’s a Reddit thread with ways to help. I definitely felt overwhelmed by a list this long, but reading the comments reminded me that the important thing is to just pick something and take action - whatever feels most doable for you or speaks to you most. As someone in the thread says, “This is an ongoing crisis that needs to be addressed from all angles; any level of support is helpful because they ultimately all work toward the same goal.”

Sending love to you all <3

— Steph

If you’re new, check out our intro to Steady Sunday here.

💻 This Week’s Meetings

Sunday, 1/25 — 10-11 a.m. PT / 1-2 p.m. ET

Tuesday, 1/27 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

Thursday, 1/29 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

Meeting links are sent in our Discord chat:

Join the Discord

✨ Meeting Notes

• This week we gathered for our ‘What’s Your Why?’ workshop and spent some time reflecting on what keeps us choosing recovery day after day. Here are a few takeaways from our convo:

  • Sobriety gives us freedom. We’re no longer controlled or held back by substances. Instead, we get to feel hopeful and excited about the future because it’s in our own hands now.

  • We’re given the gift of truly getting to know ourselves. Sobriety invites us to understand our patterns, values, and what helps us feel most like ourselves. Each sober day is a day spent coming back home to ourselves.

  • There is so much beauty and grace in stability. We stop chasing a high that never truly satisfies and begin finding fulfillment from within. Our sober selves are more than enough. “Sobriety delivers what addiction promises.”

• “Parts work” offers a reminder that we are more than any one feeling, thought, or reaction. Instead of fully owning traits like anxiety, self-doubt, or fear as who we are, it invites us to see them as parts of us that show up at certain times (often trying to protect us).

• Feeling left out (or any difficult emotion) if often outside of our control. We don’t need to shame ourselves for overthinking or feeling stuck in these emotions. As Z.S. said, sometimes the simplest thing that helps is naming the feeling, whether to yourself or a trusted friend, instead of pretending you’re okay or trying to act like it doesn’t matter. In those moments, we can offer ourselves a bit more compassion, accept that this is how we feel right now, and observe the emotion without letting it take over <3

🏆 Win of the Week

• My turn to brag about Steph! She’s now been in recovery for longer than the time she spent in active substance abuse! Okay goals!! So proud of you💛 -Annie

✍️ Journal Prompt

ICYMI: Here are the questions we reflected on and discussed in our recent What’s Your Why? Workshop:

1. What did substance use truly cost you?

2. What moments made you question your relationship with alcohol/drugs?

3. How does sobriety feel for you today?

4. Why do you choose sobriety right now?

5. Who are you becoming if you stay sober?

6. Finish this sentence: “When I forget my ‘why’, I want to remember…”

Always cheering you on,

-Steph & Annie

P.S. Have ideas for anything you’d like to see in this newsletter? Comment on this post or reply to this email!

When I was new to sobriety, I remember feeling so disgusted and ashamed of who I had been. I wanted as much distance as possible from the person I was in active substance abuse. I would hear people in these meetings say they had a few years sober, or even just a couple months, and I was in awe. I wanted so badly to have the same but I just couldn’t fathom it.

And yet, here I am, now three years sober, living a life that feels so different and so freeing. It dawned on me in a meeting recently that I finally do feel far away from that girl I once was. Sobriety has become my norm, a pillar of my life. I’m no longer cleaning up messes my past self made. I trust myself and people trust me.

I’ve gone through not just firsts, but seconds, thirds, and beyond: my first party sober, first holiday, first trip, 30 days, 100 days, 1,000 days… And while I still hold the old me close and think about her often, I feel so much less haunted by her. I mostly feel compassion for her and wish she only knew life wouldn’t always be that painful.

I share this in case it sparks hope or curiosity in anyone currently struggling with substance abuse. If that’s you, please know that you are never a lost cause, and you don’t know what you’re capable of until you try.

I am so deeply grateful for all that sobriety has given me— especially Steady Sunday ❤️. Thank you all for being part of my story. Now on with the rest of the newsletter!

— Annie

If you’re new, check out our intro to Steady Sunday here.

💻 This Week’s Meetings

Sunday, 1/18 — 10-11 a.m. PT / 1-2 p.m. ET

Tuesday, 1/20 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

Wednesday, 1/21 — What’s Your Why? A Workshop! 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

Thursday, 1/22 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

Meeting links are sent in our Discord chat:

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✨ Meeting Notes

• Many of us default to negative self-talk when we feel triggered, anxious, or overwhelmed. In those moments, the inner critic can get loud and harsh telling us stories that aren’t kind or true. When you notice this happening, try gently reframing your thoughts instead of piling on more judgment. For example, shift “I’m so bad at this” to “I’m struggling right now, but I’m learning at my own pace, and that’s okay,” or “I always mess things up” to “I made a mistake, and mistakes are part of being human.” These small shifts may feel subtle, but over time they help create more self-compassion and resilience, especially during hard moments.

• This week, we talked about confrontation and how it can often feel uncomfortable but necessary to help strengthen our relationships. Nonviolent Communication (NVC) is a psychology-based framework that can help you navigate difficult conversations with more clarity and compassion. Here’s how it works:

  • Observation: “When I see/hear/notice…” (stick to facts, free of judgment, labels, or blame)

  • Feeling: “…I feel…” (for example: frustrated, discouraged, unappreciated, uncomfortable)

  • Need: “…because I need/value…” (for example: respect, empathy, honesty, support)

  • Request: “Would you be willing to…?” (a clear ask, without demands)

  • Here’s an example of what this might look like in practice: “When I notice there’s a lot of drinking around me, I feel triggered because I need to protect my sobriety. Would you be willing to drink less when you’re around me?”

🏆 Win of the Week

• Annie is 3 years sober!!!! Annie, you are an inspiration to us all. Thank you for the care, time, and heart you pour into this community. You lead with so much light and love and we’re so grateful for you 💛

✍️ Journal Prompt

When your inner critic shows up, what does it usually say, and how can you reframe that voice with more compassion?

Always cheering you on,

-Steph & Annie

P.S. Have ideas for anything you’d like to see in this newsletter? Comment on this post or reply to this email!

This morning’s meeting was full of sobriety milestones, ranging from 10 days to 6 months. And as Z so beautifully put it, this journey is reciprocal: those with less time benefit from hearing from those with more time, and vice versa <3

Feeling so grateful for you all! Hope everyone has an amazing week.

— Steph

If you’re new, check out our intro to Steady Sunday here.

💻 This Week’s Meetings

Sunday, 1/11 — 10-11 a.m. PT / 1-2 p.m. ET

Tuesday, 1/13 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

Thursday, 1/15 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

Meeting links are sent in our Discord chat:

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✨ Meeting Notes

• This week, we talked about how socializing without alcohol can feel hard, no matter how long you’ve been sober. We’re often taught to believe that drinking makes us more relaxed or fun, so choosing not to drink can leave us feeling uncomfortable or out of place. But it’s worth asking yourself: 1) do you actually like who you are when you’re drinking? and 2) are the friendships centered around drinking truly fulfilling? While it can be tough to feel like the only one not drinking at social events, it can also be incredibly empowering. Sobriety gives you the chance to trust yourself, stay grounded in who you are, and connect with others on a more genuine level.

• When cravings hit, they can feel loud and overwhelming. Your addictive brain can be very convincing telling you that you need to drink or use. This is completely normal, and it’s often just your brain seeking dopamine (the chemical tied to relief/pleasure). Here are a few tips to help you ride out a craving without giving in:

  • Play the tape forward. Gently remind yourself what would realistically happen if you drank or used, not the short-lived fantasy your brain offers in the moment.

  • Distract yourself. Shift your focus by staying busy. Take a walk, call someone, clean, journal, or do anything that helps the urge lose momentum. [In fact, studies have shown that the average craving tends to last around 20 minutes, so as long as you can distract yourself for that long, the worst of the craving will likely subside.]

  • Prioritize your sobriety. Protect your peace by avoiding triggers, especially when your sobriety feels vulnerable. Nothing is worth sacrificing your progress. And yes, this may mean saying no to a dinner with friends or other plans if you don’t feel strong enough to go.

  • Remember that cravings are temporary, and over time they become less frequent and less intense. You’ve got this ❤️

• When you’re new to sobriety, it’s common to experience the “pink cloud,” a phase of intense happiness and optimism about your new sober life that isn’t always sustainable. When it fades, emotions can swing the other way and feel heavy or discouraging. This is normal and there’s nothing wrong with you or your journey if you experience this. Early sobriety is a big adjustment! Think of it this way: sobriety is likely the first time in a while you’re experiencing your emotions without substances numbing or amplifying them. Learning to face your sober feelings can feel scary and unfamiliar, but with time, you’ll come to understand what a gift it actually is.

• Many people know the “obvious” benefits of sobriety—better physical and mental health. But what’s talked about less is the quiet contentment that comes from the steadiness of a sober life. Not the high highs, but a life that feels calmer, more manageable, and easier to trust yourself. On the surface, it might seem boring, but for many of us, it’s this feeling of steadiness that matters most.

🏆 Win of the Week

• A.P.C. is 3 weeks sober!

• G.S. is 2 weeks sober (and took their first ski lesson)!

• J.G. hit 6 months sober!

✍️ Journal Prompt

A perk of sobriety is that we get to decide how we show up in social spaces (vs letting alcohol dictate our actions and words). That said,

How do you hope people feel after they spend time with you?

Always cheering you on,

-Steph & Annie

P.S. Have ideas for anything you’d like to see in this newsletter? Comment on this post or reply to this email!

We just hopped off our Sunday meeting, where we had a really thoughtful conversation about Dry January and today’s growing sober movement as a whole. Dry January has become pretty commonplace, and there are more non-alc beverage options at grocery stores and restaurants than ever before. Both of these things have helped make being “sober” more mainstream, which is amazing, but sometimes it can unintentionally minimize the experience of those of us in recovery.

Ten years ago, when someone said they were “sober”, it usually meant they were in recovery and had done (and were still doing) a lot of deep work. Now, when someone says they’re sober, it could also mean they’re taking a break, doing it for health reasons, or just experimenting with not drinking.

That said, those in recovery may feel two things at once: genuinely grateful that drinking culture is shifting, and at the same time, feeling like our stories and the work behind them aren’t always fully seen.

All that to say, if you feel the need to differentiate when sharing your story with others, that’s great. And if you don’t, that’s okay too. What matters most is seeking and being a part of spaces where people do understand the full depth of your experience and the work behind it. Spaces like this one :)

— Steph

If you’re new, check out our intro to Steady Sunday here.

💻 This Week’s Meetings

Sunday, 1/4 — 10-11 a.m. PT / 1-2 p.m. ET

Tuesday, 1/6 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

Thursday, 1/8 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

Meeting links are sent in our Discord chat:

Join the Discord

✨ Meeting Notes

Whether this is your first Dry January or you’ve done it before, it’s always helpful to go back to the basics. A month without alcohol can bring up a lot of emotions (excitement, fear, curiosity, discomfort to name a few) all of which are completely normal. The first step is being open to giving sobriety a try, so if you’ve come that far, you’re already in great shape for what’s next! Here are some of our tips for making the most out of your Dry January:

Fully commit.

• If you’re committing to Dry January, you might as well commit 100% to get the most out of it, right? You can lean into sobriety by connecting with other sober people (like this group!) and engaging with sober content such as quit lit (books), podcasts, or sober creators. The more you immerse yourself and learn about what alcohol actually does to our bodies, the less you’ll romanticize drinking, and over time you’ll begin to reframe how you see alcohol.

Take it one day at a time.

• A full month can feel daunting, especially if you’re hyper-focused on how many days you have until you can drink again. Instead of treating alcohol as a reward at the finish line, try being present and really taking things one day at a time. You don’t need to decide anything about February yet.

Embrace discomfort.

• Sobriety often means feeling things you usually avoid. You may not be used to socializing sober or even being alone with your thoughts sober. It’s natural for these things to feel uncomfortable at first, but know that the most growth happens here. You will feel so empowered every time you prove to yourself what you’re capable of!

Notice the benefits.

• Keep note of what improves along the way. At first, you may notice benefits like better sleep, clearer thinking, or improved mood. But as the days go on, you’ll likely experience even more meaningful ones, like higher self-esteem, improved relationships, and real hope for your future. ♥️

One of the greatest parts of sobriety is the inspiration we draw from others walking the same path. Whether it’s learning their stories or engaging in real, honest conversations about substance use and recovery, the wisdom we gather along the way is truly invaluable. In that spirit, here are some of our favorite motivational quotes:

• “Everything you want is on the other side of consistency.”

• “Sobriety delivers what alcohol promises.”

• “Discipline is self love. It’s showing up for yourself even when you don’t feel like it.”

• “Sobriety isn’t just about putting down the drink. It’s about building a life you don’t want to escape from anymore.”

• “Sobriety is the ultimate revolution against a world that sells numbness as joy.”

• “I got sober because I wanted a better life. I stay sober because I got one.”

🔗 Resource of the Week

If you need a little extra motivation to stay on track this month, non-alc beverage brand De Soi (and Steph’s place of employment 🙂) is hosting a ton of Dry January promos and events. Follow them on Instagram for updates.

✍️ Journal Prompt

That’s all for now! We hope you enjoyed this edition of our newsletter.

Always cheering you on,

-Steph & Annie

P.S. Have ideas for anything you’d like to see in this newsletter? Comment on this post or reply to this email!

I love the new year as a fresh start, but I don’t always love how much it symbolizes the passing of time (a big source of my anxiety). Life feels like it’s moving so fast right now, but I’ve realized that even that feeling is a gift. I’ve seen, in myself and friends, how certain seasons can make a year feel like the longest ever: grief, job searching, chronic illness, or being stuck in a relationship that isn’t serving you.

Each year around this time, I try to shift my mindset: how lucky are we to get another year? To wake up not just on Jan 1, but every day after that. Of course, this is easy to forget amidst work/life/holiday stress, but the new year is a great time to recalibrate this mindset!

I hope everyone has a fab NYE and starts the new year off doing something YOU want to do. And just a reminder: you don’t have to rebrand your whole life overnight. Real change happens little by little. <3

-Steph

As we reflect on the past year, we’re feeling incredibly grateful for everything we’ve shared together. There’s real power in coming together with other young adults navigating growth, vulnerability, and healing. This community reminds us that we’re never alone and that we grow stronger together, always. Thank you for making Steady Sunday so special.

-Annie

Here’s to the lessons of 2025 and stepping into 2026 with intention and momentum. We’re ready for you, 2026! First stop: DRY JANUARY!

If you’re new, check out our intro to Steady Sunday here.

💻 This Week’s Meetings

Sunday, 12/28 — 10-11 a.m. PT / 1-2 p.m. ET

Tuesday, 12/30 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

Thursday, 1/1 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

Meeting links are sent in our Discord chat:

Join the Discord

✨ Meeting Notes

• This past week, we talked about the quote “healing cannot happen in isolation.” Many of us were taught in childhood, or somewhere along the way, that it’s better to keep things bottled up and that asking for help is a sign of weakness. As we heal, we have to do the hard (but deeply rewarding) work of unlearning these beliefs that have kept us stuck. Leaning on others and asking for support is actually a radical act of self-compassion. It supports our own growth and healing, deepens our relationships with vulnerability, and makes others feel safe to do the same.

  • Note: This can feel REALLY daunting, especially if you’re not used to reaching out for help. Just start with one small step. Send a text to a trusted friend/parent/coworker, saying something like: “Hey, I’d love to chat about how I’ve been feeling. Can we grab coffee?” Even this tiny act can open the door to connection!

• As we continue to reflect on the past year and set intentions for 2026, it’s important to recognize how our pasts prove to us that we are capable of doing hard things. Think about everything *you* made happen this year, especially the moments when the road was rocky and you kept going anyway. That persistence is a testament to your strength and resilience! It can feel scary to think about the future, but when we remember what we’re capable of, our mindset becomes more optimistic and hopeful.

✨ Win of the Week

Z.S. celebrates 3 years sober on 1/1! We are soo stinkin’ proud of you <3

✍️ Journal Prompt

This week, we talked about fear and how writing down our fears can help us face them.

Is there something you’re fearful of next year? Why does it scare you?

Write it down. Seeing it on paper makes it real, and also gives us the space to understand it, work through it, and take the first step toward moving past it. Sometimes, it may even help you realize that your fears aren’t as grounded in reality as they feel :)

That’s all for now! See ya in 2026!!

P.S. Have ideas for sections, callouts, or anything you’d love to see in this newsletter? Comment on this post or reply to this email!

Always cheering you on,

-Steph & Annie

In total honesty, work has been crazy lately (I’m sure many of you can relate!), and Steady Sunday began to feel more like a chore than a space to breathe. But moving SS to Substack and making this community free again has breathed new life into it, and I’m so excited for what’s ahead!

I also want to give a huge shoutout to our Tuesday host, Annie, who helps me write these newsletters each week! She is such a light in this community and I truly couldn’t do it without her <3

— Steph

P.S. We’re still playing around with the format of these newsletters, so bear with us as we get settled.

💻 This Week’s Meetings

Sunday, 12/21 — 10-11 a.m. PT / 1-2 p.m. ET

Tuesday, 12/23 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET

PSA: We do not have a meeting on Thursday, 12/25. Merry Christmas!

Meeting links are sent in our Discord chat:

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✨ Meeting Notes

• We had a Topic-Focused Meeting last week where we chatted about our end-of-year reflections and what we want to bring into the new year (my heart was so full after this meeting!). ICYMI, here’s what some of you said:

What was your biggest win or accomplishment this year?

• “I got a promotion!”

• “Running a half marathon!”

• “I got over my fear of flying (thanks to my pilot boyfriend).”

• “I got married!”

• “Tomorrow I’m one year sober!”

• “I started my business this year :)”

What was a challenge you worked through this year? What did it teach you?

• “I struggled this year being there for friends that were going through a hard time, but put my own needs on the back burner as a result. I learned that it’s important to fill my cup first in order to be the best friend I can be.”

• “I was overprescribed mental health medication, so this was the year of weaning off and going through withdrawals. I had to take time off work and struggled with feeling like I wasn’t contributing to society, but that time gave me the space to reflect and realize I wanted to switch careers!”

• “My wife had a medical emergency. At first I tried to proceed with life/work as normal, but I learned I can’t and shouldn’t just keep going when things are hard - and that’s ok.”

• For many of us, self-criticism feels like our default setting. When we notice behaviors or patterns we don’t like, we often turn to shame, believing we need to be harsh with ourselves to create real change. That inner critic can be loud and unforgiving, but one of the most important lessons of recovery is that shame isn’t a sustainable motivator and often keeps us stuck. Shifting from shame to self-compassion doesn’t just support sobriety; it’s a mindset that helps us grow in every area of life.

• As the year comes to a close and we reflect on what went well for us and what didn’t, it’s important not only to acknowledge our wins, but to really let ourselves feel proud of them. Growth deserves to be felt, not brushed past. Here are some affirmations you can try as you reflect on the year you’ve had:

  • I allow myself to feel proud of how far I’ve come, even if I’ve made mistakes along the way.

  • I honor my growth, including the lessons that came from the hard moments.

  • I am grateful for the strength it took to keep showing up this year.

  • I can hold pride and humility at the same time.

  • I deserve to celebrate myself without minimizing my progress.

• This week, we talked about how friendships should make us feel good (even though we sometimes forget that). Many of us have struggled with friendships that feel draining, one-sided, or unsupportive, and the cons of staying friends outweigh any pros. The truth is, you shouldn’t have to work so hard to find the good in a friend. The friendships you deserve should feel supportive, mutual, and far more positive than negative. Remember: quality > quantity, and the right people will find you. ❤️

✨ Win of the Week

L.O. is bravely changing career paths and going back to school to follow her dream of becoming a mental health counselor! So proud of you!

✍️ Journal Prompt

In case you missed our annual Reflections & Intentions meeting, here are the prompts we worked through:

• What was your biggest win this year?

• What was your biggest challenge this year? What did it teach you?

• Who/what made you the happiest this year?

• What do you want more of in 2026? What do you want less of?

• Where would you like to be this time next year?

• What’s one word you want your 2026 to embody?

That’s all for today. I hope this holiday season is bringing you all more joy than stress <3 Hopefully see you in a meeting this week, but if not, we’re sending you lots of love!

Here’s what to expect from Steady Sunday:

• A community of sober and sober-curious folks in their 20s and 30s <3

• No paywalls! This is a completely free community.

• Free virtual meetings 3–4x a week — aka lots of opportunities to connect, share, or just listen :)

• Weekly(ish) newsletters with meeting notes, resources, plus the schedule for upcoming meetings. You can also always check the weekly meeting schedule here.

• A 24/7 Discord space to chat with other members. All meeting Zoom links are shared in our Discord, so be sure to join if you haven’t already! Quick note: It may take up to 24 hours for your Discord request to be approved - hang tight!

• Other FAQs can be found here.

  Join the Discord

Before you dive in, here are a few community guidelines:

1. You don’t need to be fully sober to be here—we welcome all stages of the sober or sober-curious journey. That said, please be mindful of our members in recovery by avoiding detailed or celebratory discussions of alcohol or drug use. Reflection is welcome, but glorifying substance use is not :)

2. Be respectful of others and their stories. This is a judgment-free community, and everyone deserves to feel safe and supported here.

3. Please avoid discussions of calories, weight, dieting, or other diet-culture topics to protect members in eating disorder recovery.

4. Use trigger warnings when sharing sensitive topics. Please place them clearly at the beginning of your message or share so others can engage at their own comfort level.

If you’re ever unsure whether something is okay to share, feel free to message Steph directly on Discord. If there is ongoing or intentional disregard for these rules, you will be removed from the group.

So glad you’re here! xx