Reflecting on 3 years of sobriety (!!!)
"You are never a lost cause."
Hi everyone, happy Sunday! Annie here :) Yesterday, I celebrated three years sober (yay!!), which brought me to reflect on my recovery and the amazing impact it’s had on my life so far. In the spirit of paying it forward, I wanted to share a bit with you all.
When I was new to sobriety, I remember feeling so disgusted and ashamed of who I had been. I wanted as much distance as possible from the person I was in active substance abuse. I would hear people in these meetings say they had a few years sober, or even just a couple months, and I was in awe. I wanted so badly to have the same but I just couldn’t fathom it.
And yet, here I am, now three years sober, living a life that feels so different and so freeing. It dawned on me in a meeting recently that I finally do feel far away from that girl I once was. Sobriety has become my norm, a pillar of my life. I’m no longer cleaning up messes my past self made. I trust myself and people trust me.
I’ve gone through not just firsts, but seconds, thirds, and beyond: my first party sober, first holiday, first trip, 30 days, 100 days, 1,000 days… And while I still hold the old me close and think about her often, I feel so much less haunted by her. I mostly feel compassion for her and wish she only knew life wouldn’t always be that painful.
I share this in case it sparks hope or curiosity in anyone currently struggling with substance abuse. If that’s you, please know that you are never a lost cause, and you don’t know what you’re capable of until you try.
I am so deeply grateful for all that sobriety has given me— especially Steady Sunday ❤️. Thank you all for being part of my story. Now on with the rest of the newsletter!
— Annie
If you’re new, check out our intro to Steady Sunday here.
💻 This Week’s Meetings
Sunday, 1/18 — 10-11 a.m. PT / 1-2 p.m. ET
Tuesday, 1/20 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET
Wednesday, 1/21 — What’s Your Why? A Workshop! 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET
Thursday, 1/22 — 5:30-6:30 p.m. PT / 8:30-9:30 p.m. ET
Meeting links are sent in our Discord chat:
✨ Meeting Notes
Many of us default to negative self-talk when we feel triggered, anxious, or overwhelmed. In those moments, the inner critic can get loud and harsh telling us stories that aren’t kind or true. When you notice this happening, try gently reframing your thoughts instead of piling on more judgment. For example, shift “I’m so bad at this” to “I’m struggling right now, but I’m learning at my own pace, and that’s okay,” or “I always mess things up” to “I made a mistake, and mistakes are part of being human.” These small shifts may feel subtle, but over time they help create more self-compassion and resilience, especially during hard moments.
This week, we talked about confrontation and how it can often feel uncomfortable but necessary to help strengthen our relationships. Nonviolent Communication (NVC) is a psychology-based framework that can help you navigate difficult conversations with more clarity and compassion. Here’s how it works:
Observation: “When I see/hear/notice…” (stick to facts, free of judgment, labels, or blame)
Feeling: “…I feel…” (for example: frustrated, discouraged, unappreciated, uncomfortable)
Need: “…because I need/value…” (for example: respect, empathy, honesty, support)
Request: “Would you be willing to…?” (a clear ask, without demands)
Here’s an example of what this might look like in practice: “When I notice there’s a lot of drinking around me, I feel triggered because I need to protect my sobriety. Would you be willing to drink less when you’re around me?”
🏆 Win of the Week
Annie is 3 years sober!!!! Annie, you are an inspiration to us all. Thank you for the care, time, and heart you pour into this community. You lead with so much light and love and we’re so grateful for you 💛
✍️ Journal Prompt
When your inner critic shows up, what does it usually say, and how can you reframe that voice with more compassion?
Always cheering you on,
-Steph & Annie
P.S. Have ideas for anything you’d like to see in this newsletter? Comment on this post or reply to this email!
Congratulations. I remember when I first got sober and I almost felt shameful when telling people I was getting sober because that was admitting to them that I had a problem. Now having been sober for almost 6 years, I actively talk to people about my sobriety and instead of shame I feel immensely proud. Keep up the great work Annie and here’s to another 3 years and beyond!
Congrats on 3 years Annie! You’re amazing!